Thursday, February 5, 2009

GROSS

All my kids have done things this week that have really grossed me out.  And I have a high tolerance for germs and grossness.  I guess that makes me gross too.  Here is a sampling of gross things that has happened since Monday:

First, Will is obsessed with the toilet.  He can't keep his hands off it or out of it.  This is mildly gross, but the problem is, is that Clara and Sam usually forget to flush after use which makes it really gross.  I have found him more than once, this week, up to his armpits in toilet water.
Second, I myself was using the toilet, when Will appeared suddenly from around the corner and threw some large-ish item into the water while I was still sitting there.  I had to fish the object out with my (gloved) hands.  It was gross.  And it turned out to be a rock from goodness knows where?

Third, Sam and I were in a swimwear store trying to find a bathing suit for Clara.  While flipping through the rack I feel Sam poking me, trying to get my attention.  I turn, and he has a hygiene liner stuck over his mouth.  "Mom...look at me!" he says, excited about his find and that he has taped his lips together with it.  I yell at him "that is so gross!".  He was deflated, poor guy.

Fourth, for some absurd reason, I handed Will a bottle of peach/mango yoghurt drink while in his car seat.  Sure enough, he immediately dumps it and the thick yellowy orangey liquid pools in his neck, on his pants and in the seat.  I don't like yoghurt at the best of times (the texture makes me gag), so I found this really gross.  Sam says it looks like cream of booger stew (it is still on the seat, dried up now, but still there).

Fifth, while still on the topic of the car, I ventured to the very back of our stinky mini van where Clara (and her dolls) sit, hoping to find Sam's missing Spiderman pencil.  She has a tendency to store items, including drink and food, in the cup holders beside her seat.  I found a sandwich, or at least I think it was a sandwich, since it was pretty much in liquid form. Goodness knows how old it was?  It was really gross.

Sixth, I found Will in the bathroom, tossing Clara's toothbrush into the toilet, leaning over and fishing it out, sucking on it and then offering it to me as proud as can be.  I threw it out, of course, but then wondered with horror, how many other toothbrushes had he done this to? Gross thought.

Seventh, it involves Will's poop and Kirby eating it.  That's all I will say.  It's too gross.

Lastly, and this happens at least once a day, I was sitting on the floor installing (yet more) batteries for Sam, when I felt a poke on my neck followed by a thunk on my head...it kind of felt like a hairbrush, but it is actually the toilet brush.  A stinky and wet toilet brush that has just been swished around in the toilet by Will.  I just hope Sam and Clara remembered to flush the toilet this time...

Sorry about this post.  It really is gross.

3 comments:

Lisa said...

haha o my goodness! I laughed out loud.... those are all incredibly gross but funny! The joys of little children.

Briar said...

This is SO funny Becky! I laughed out loud here in my basement. Thanks for sharing :)

Jessy said...

This whole post made me laugh so hard! Thanks for sharing...and here's hoping Will loses interest in the toilet soon!